LUTHER'S GOT DAT

LUTHER'S GOT DAT
(sung to Baby Got Back by Sir Mix A Lot)

{Yashur and Otis talking}
Oh my God, Otis, look at his finger,
It is SO long.
He looks like one of those creepy guys at the roller rink.
Who even likes them?
They only talk to him because, well,
He looks like he could satisfy a blue whale with that finger, okay?
I mean, his index, it's just so long.
I can't believe it's just so large, it's like,
So protruding, I mean – gross!
Look! He's just so….creepy!

{Carrie Oakey comes in}
I like long fingers and I can not lie
You other ladies can't deny
When Luther walks in with that finger the size of a car
And he points at your dirt-star
You get wet! Wanna change your lil panties
Cause you notice that finger was lengthy.
Shaky in the knees I get,
Cause the Brewster's makin me wet.

Oh baby, I want that finger,
And let it linger,
My homegirls tried to tell me,
That it'd go so deep it'd make me bleed.

Ohhh, Luther Brewster,
Say you wanna fornicate with me?
Well use me, use me,
Cause you ain't got no STDs.
I've seen it bendin,
Come here and lend me,
That hand, man,
So I can cream like Stam in a can.
I'm tired of other girls,
Saying the fingering don't feel good,
Cause the average girl will say,
It feels great all day.

So ladies, (YEAH!) ladies, (YEAH!)
Has your man got that index? (Hell yeah!)
Tell him to wiggle it! Wiggle it!
Wiggle that long pointer!
Luther's got 'dat!


I like it long, and smooth,
As it touches my coot,
All you ladies should know, that the appetizer,
Is as good as the meal.
I wanna feel that knuckle,
And ugh, farther up, ugh ugh,
I ain't talkin about fistin,
Cause I only do this and kissin.
I want it real long and silky, so don't use that huge double,
This Oakey's in trouble,
Got me moanin and mumblin.

So I'm lookin at it curl like a bow,
Quivering and shakin like whoa,
Luth give me that knuckle,
Quick, my knees may buckle

A word to Rufus and Yashur, don't hate that finga,
Cause it might point and hit ya,
But I gotta be true when I say it hurts,
All night and day long,
Luth's got it going on,
His tip's the size of King Kongs.
Cause Yash is drunk and that's a fact,
So I'll stay and play with Luth,
Cause it's long, and it's strong,
And I ain't talking about his ding dong.
So, fellas (yeah!) fellas (yeah!)
You should envy that long finger, (yeah!)
Cause you aint got, that length,
Even loose hoes got to shout
Luther's got dat!

Yeahhhh, fellas, when it comes to pleasure,
The Brewster's the pro.

So other fellas tryin to see, but they ain't got that long Luth beam,
That long digit that always makes us girls cream,
My shaved-clean-dirt-star don't want that,
Unless it's Luth's large "bat",
Ruf and Oats can dobble,
But their digits ain't got dat,
Stam wanna try to do his role,
But it ain't close to Luth's large pole,
So they leave it, to the Brew,
While the crew gives the news.
So Yash is drunk again,
While Luth makes it bend,
Cause Oats is watchin while Ruf is copping and feeling,
And Carrie is creaming.

To the other news crews in the world,
You ain't it at all.
We're the best, and no less,
We're tight as family nests.
Some others try to mime,
The best Sandy Times,
We're all unique and special,
But Carrie wants a Luth facial.
So everybody, everywhere,
If you want the news delivered,
Dial 1-800-SANDYT
And get the best news team,
Luther's got 'dat.



Please Don't Lose That Butt,
Carrie Oakey