His name is Yahsur Norton,
Not Dr. Seuss or Tim Horton.
Some call him Turtle or Norm,
But to drink, this man was born.
His mom's a MILF,
In her nightgown of silk,
While Barry tickles her ear,
With this twenty year old beard.
His scruff comes in red,
One time I thought he was dead,
He was not responding, his eyes a-slant,
But he was fine, he just deuced his pants.
Beer for breakfast, Jack for lunch,
Jager for dinner, his friends had a hunch,
That this ain't normal, this ain't right,
This alcoholic is takin' names tonight!
The night's winding down,
His pants not yet brown,
Sees a girl as he leaves the bar in a blur,
And starts to slur and yell, Yashur Alfuqur!
~Associated Staff Writer
~Carrie "I'm not OK" Oakey
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