Tuesday, December 23, 2008

ODE TO THE ALCHY

His name is Yahsur Norton,
Not Dr. Seuss or Tim Horton.
Some call him Turtle or Norm,
But to drink, this man was born.

His mom's a MILF,
In her nightgown of silk,
While Barry tickles her ear,
With this twenty year old beard.

His scruff comes in red,
One time I thought he was dead,
He was not responding, his eyes a-slant,
But he was fine, he just deuced his pants.

Beer for breakfast, Jack for lunch,
Jager for dinner, his friends had a hunch,
That this ain't normal, this ain't right,
This alcoholic is takin' names tonight!

The night's winding down,
His pants not yet brown,
Sees a girl as he leaves the bar in a blur,
And starts to slur and yell, Yashur Alfuqur!


~Associated Staff Writer
~Carrie "I'm not OK" Oakey

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